a joke………….?
Question by ladylafemme1: a joke………….?
Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were. The first man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a Chemist and the fourth man was a Government Employee.
To show off, the Engineer called his cat,
“T-square, do your stuff.”
T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.
But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, “Spreadsheet, do your stuff.”
Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies. Everyone agreed that was good.
But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said “Measure, do your stuff.”
Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk,, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass.
Everyone agreed that was pretty good.
Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, “What can your cat do?”
The Government Employee called his cat and said…..
“Coffee Break…..do your stuff.”
Coffee Break jumped to his feet………..
ate the cookies……………
drank the milk…………..
sh*t on the paper………………..
screwed the other three cats…………………
claimed he injured his back while doing so………………
filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions………
put in for Workers Compensation……………
and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave………….!!!!!!!!!!
Best answer:
Answer by dracofan93
So true so true……………Made me laugh so have a star
What do you think? Answer below!
thts like so true!
try these….
1
Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.
Instead of characteristically telling her it’s not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. “If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds.”
Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.
“How long will this take?” she asks.
“They’ll grow larger over a period of years,” he replies.
The wife stops. “Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?”
“Worked for your butt, didn’t it?”
He lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..
2
Man driving down road.
Woman driving up same road
They pass each other
Woman yells out her window, “PIG!”
Man yells out his window, “B.I.T.C.H!”
Man rounds next curve
Crashes into a huge pig in middle of road.
Thought For The Day : If only men would listen.
3
The mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple’s
house. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her
daughter-in-law standing naked by the door.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the
daughter-in-law
answered.
“But you’re naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.
“This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law explained.
“Love dress? But you’re naked!”
“My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it
makes me
happy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home
from
work any minute.”
The mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the
way
home she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed,
showered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally
her
husband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
“This is my love dress” she replied.
“Needs ironing.” he said.
HEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
thats better girl back on form lol 10/10